Bringing a newborn baby home and watching them grow up is a wonderful journey of discovery and bonding for a lot of parents. But it can also be a very mentally and emotionally trying time, especially if you’re a little more prone to anxiety or concern. One aspect of a baby’s growth that is a common source of concern is when they go to sleep. A lot of parents worry about whether it’s safe, whether they’re doing it right, or how their baby compares to others. Here, we’re going to look at common concerns, what you can do to ease them, and how to learn to be a little less tightly wound about them in general.
Understanding The Recommended Sleep Hours
There is a lot of concern about what’s “normal” and “expected” for babies. Traditional wisdom says that a newborn baby should sleep anywhere from 14 to 17 hours a day, decreasing to 12-16 hours a day after those first few months and then steadily decreasing over time from there. This includes naps and is typically done in short bursts rather than big nighttime blocks of sleep. If your baby is sleeping a little more or even several hours less than that, it’s not necessarily a cause for worry, especially as growth spurts, temporary illnesses, and other developmental changes can disrupt that sleep often. So long as they’re eating well, gaining weight, and alert when they’re awake, they’re likely meeting their sleeping needs.
Accept That They Might Have Odd Habits
Babies do not often fit predictable sleeping patterns, and there’s no clear picture of what a “normal” baby’s sleep looks like, especially in those long months. If they have short naps, long naps, late bedtimes, or early awakenings, it doesn’t necessarily mean anything about their quality of sleep. Again, as long as they show the signs of being well-rested when they’re awake, you’re likely doing just fine. Trying to force a rigid schedule can lead to more disruption and a cranky baby who isn’t ready to go to sleep or to be awoken yet, so try to be flexible and let them sleep as and when they need it.
Safety Is More Important Than Perfection
How and when a baby sleeps can be a cause of some anxiety, especially in terms of how safe your baby is. It is important to follow safety guidelines, such as placing babies on their backs, using a firm mattress, and keeping the sleep space free of loose items. If a baby wakes up, it’s not necessarily a sign that there’s any danger. Managing their temperature can help you rest assured of their safety, too. If they have hot, sweaty skin, remove layers of clothing and try to maintain a cool room. Cold hands and feet are normal, too, but a cool chest or neck means they’re too cold and need a little extra warmth, like added layers of clothing.
Don’t Lose Your Cool Over Every Sleep Noise
New parents are often spun into a panic by the many, many different noises that babies can make when they’re sleeping. Learning to identify the noises babies make while sleeping can save you a lot of stress. If they’re grunting, snorting, sighing, or even briefly crying out, it’s not an indicator that they’re in trouble or discomfort, or even that they’re awake, and sometimes, overreacting and rushing to their side can wake them up. There are noises that you should keep an ear out for that are worth researching, but learning the difference between those, the sounds of a baby truly waking up, or the little utterances during a restful sleep can save you a lot of energy and stress.
Sleep Developments Can Switch Things Up
The only consistent aspect of a growing baby is inconsistency, and that applies to sleep, as well. Whether they learn to roll, start growing teeth, or become more sure on their knees, then their feet, you can expect disruptions to sleep as they grow. When these disruptions come, you might need to spend a little more time soothing your baby to help them sleep, but they’re typically nothing to worry about. Understanding them as developmental norms rather than concerning new changes can help you acknowledge and accept them as signs of growth. One change that comes over time is the shift to more predictable sleeping patterns, too, so these changes are something to celebrate.
Drop The Comparison Anxiety
Perhaps the worst part of being a parent is the anxiety and stress that comes, partially, from worrying about what other parents and babies are getting up to. Sometimes, you learn a neat trick or tip, but more often, you just start comparing your own journey with theirs, and that is rarely good. First of all, some parents exaggerate, but even if they’re not, it’s no indication that you’re doing anything different. Stop measuring your success against other parents and aim to accommodate your habits to your baby’s needs. If Jodie down the way has a baby that sleeps throughout the night and stays up all day, that’s good for her. If your baby needs a nap in the daytime, make sure they get it.
Make Sure You Get Enough Sleep, Too
When a parent worries about their baby’s sleeping all the time, it’s most likely to lead to sleep deprivation. Common wisdom says that parents need to get sleep when their baby sleeps, because they’re not very likely to get it at any other time. Of course, you should also be willing to accept help from your partner, your family members, or your friends when you can catch up on some shuteye. Losing sleep because you hear an odd grunt or because you’re not certain your baby got that 15th hour of sleep is not going to help you; it’s just going to make you more stressed and less able to support your baby as you should.
Telling a parent to “stop worrying” isn’t often all that helpful, but hopefully, the tips to help manage your sleep anxiety about your baby can ease your concerns at least somewhat.
